Energy Drinks

After several crazy days of running around like a chicken with it's head cut off (don't get your panties in a wad PETA, it's just a figure of speech), I found myself falling asleep while driving. This scared the crap out of me, so I stopped off for one of those so called energy drinks. My thinking was that if it will keep me awake long enough to get home, what's the harm? I must have looked lost or something while standing in front of the cooler trying to pick out a drink from the thousands of choices that were displayed, because a trucker looking dude asked if I needed help. I told him that I have never tried an energy drink before, he looked at me like I was some sort of freak but helped me pick one out any way. He said "This un here werks reel good little lady". I knew that I could trust his recommendation since he referred to me as little and a lady in the same sentence. Guess what?, the stuff works! I popped the tab and started drinking it as soon as I got back into my car, it tasted pretty good too. I perked right up, no worries about getting home now. I'm in such a good mood I think that I'll turn the radio on, ohhhhh, love that song...turn it up...no crank it up, rock on!!!! What a pretty butterfly, is it in my car???? Did that tree just wave at me? How nice...those people are honking and telling me that I'm #1 with hand gestures......I'm hungry...there's a Micky D's off the next exit...I hate Micky D's how about that Taco Bell then...I'll get gas...that's nasty...that guy is passing me...he must want to race...woohooo....faster.....oh no my drink is all gone....so sad.....I gotta pee....wow how did I get this far so fast?I'll be home in a few minutesthen I'll get somethingtoeatand anotherenergydrinkohwaitIdonthaveanyathomecoolcarwhatahunkdrivngitbethesgayallthecuteonesaremaybesomeonewillbringmeanotherengerydrinkineedaotheronegottahavemore........dothesepantsmakemelookfat?weeegoingsofastIlovedrivingfastmymindisgoingfast.....fastfastfast....

(((MUAH)))

UNDERGEAR

While searching for pictures of Bert & Ernie, I came across this little fashion accessory...

Undergear Shape Enhancer Boxer
"Redefine your look in seconds! Get dramatic results from a padded front that promises a fuller, beefier silhouette. A defining center back seam that separates and creates a rounder appearance. Hipster back for ample coverage".

It comes in sizes small to XX-large. Don't get me wrong, I love checking out a nice package (that's how I met my husband), but Holy Mother of Pearl, a XX-Large bulge? I'd run away screaming. Every orifice on my body would be squeezed so tight, you wouldn't be able to pry them apart with a crowbar!

(((MUAH)))

Jamie Lee Curtis

Jamie Lee has such an enormous ego, that she thinks that what she says is the gospel truth.

I first heard about Ms. Curtis's article from the gang at BTC.

Here are my thoughts about Ms. Curtis's comments.
What makes Ms. Curtis think that everyone who watch's reality shows, do so for negative reasons only? I don't watch because I am "obsessed with watching people lose", I watch because I like to see people win. These shows have also taught me to be more creative in my own cooking, decorating, fashion and so on. The fact that someone who has never watched a reality show before or even how to turn a television on (why does she have one then?), considers themselves able to judge the shows themselves or the viewers who watch these shows, is a conceited fool at best. Oh yeah, did you happen to notice that she used the opportunity to hawk her book? Me thinks that Ms. Curtis is a bit of a hypocrite.(((MUAH)))

Happy Monday!

Why am I in such a good mood you may ask?
The reason is that my family went on a float trip this past weekend and I got to relax away from the telephone, my husband's mistress (the TV), my mother-in-law and all the other things that drive me crazy.

Oh yeah, and I got some nature booty.

Getting booty away's makes the Ho a happy Ho.

(((MUAH)))